Timeline

The following is a timeline of the history of the /r/GoCommitDie lore-iverse. Feel free to add dates of events here.

Pre-2000

 * Mortar dragon is born on 1200
 * In 1889, a scientist accidentally creates the first ever group of despacito spiders. She promptly kills all but one, who escapes to the sewers and later kills the scientist. The survivor becomes known as Hitler Stalin Despacito.
 * In 1890, Aileen Wuornos Despacita is born under near identical circumstances to Hitler Stalin Despacito.
 * In 1900, the SCP Foundation is founded.
 * In 1901, Hitler Stalin Despacito and Aileen Wuornos Despacita start dating.
 * In 1902, Jeuse arrives from the far future just to rape Aileen Wuornos Despacita. He fails, however, because of the valiant efforts of Hitler Stalin Despacito.
 * In 1910, Hitler Stalin Despacito and Aileen Wuornos Despacita marry each other.
 * Kung-Fucito spider was Born sometime in 1931
 * 6ix9ine is born on May 8, 1998.


 * Content Cop is born on July 27th, 1990.

2000

 * Chad Despacito was born to Hitler Stalin Despacito and Aileen Wuornos Despacita sometime during this year.
 * From 2000 - 2010, Baby Killing Police 2 joins The Robloxian Police Force

January

 * 1st: THANOS listens to Despacito by Luis Fonzi in the future, and travels back in time to this date to create the Despacito Spiders.

2001

 * Rebellious Teen Despacito was born sometime during this year.

January

 * 1st: Hitler Stalin Despacito and Aileen Wuornos Despacita are crowned king and queen of despacito.
 * 1st cont: Hitler Stalin Despacito and Aileen Wuornos Despacita are renamed to King Despacito and Queen Despacita.

September

 * T Posing Mario Was Cloned in E Gadd's Lab During Luigi's Mansion

November

 * 7th: Communist Despacito was born as Freedom Despacito

June

 * 19th: Dangerfish Despacito is born

2003

 * Despacito, Birdspacito, and Penguin Despacito were born sometime this year.

2006

 * Roomrecord is born sometime in this year.

August

 * 17th: Baby Killing Police 2's Partner, BKP 1, dies to a baby killing serial killer during a case with Content Cop. BKP 2 and Content Cop manage to catch the killer.

April

 * 20th: Content Cop busts a Mexican drug cartel. He became so emotionally scarred from these events that he quit his job to become a youtuber.

June

 * 30th: Robloxian High School opens.
 * 31st: ROBLOX High School opens.

August

 * 13th: Bobb solidgerman dies from an infection.

2013

 * The Despacito Spiders are forced to migrate to Robloxian High School after ROBLOX High School kicks them out.

January

 * 1st: PP Extendus Man creates PPium, a religion that follows a god shaped like a PP.

2014

 * Extendo forms a religion called called Extenderous to rival PPium

September

 * 12th: The Leafy Content Cop is uploaded to Youtube.


 * 16th: Content Cop makes an unexpected return to law enforcement, quitting his job as a youtuber. It is unknown if this is due to the backlash of the Leafy Content Cop.


 * 26th: Jevel57 is born, one of the youngest rappers of our time.

January

 * 14th: The Despatrio is formed, consisting of Gay Monster, Rice Farmer, and Reverse Trit.

September

 * 22nd: Communism Man emerges from his bunker and moves to America.

October

 * 9th: Communism Man founds the Communist Independent Party in his quest to convert America to communism.

2018

 * The OOO was created during this year.


 * Mr Despacito was born sometime between the months of January and March.

March

 * 14th: Principal Dong Kong is caught offering his PP to a freshman student, but nothing happens to him because he is the principal.

April

 * 1st: Mr Despacito is elected as vice principal of Robloxian High School.


 * 4th: Dr. Cubano realizes reading about Despacito Spiders isn't enough, and heads to Robloxia High School to search for them. He manages to find Mr Despacito, who's willing to let Dr. Cubano perform experiments on him, at one cost.


 * 5th: Dr. Cubano finds out that Despacito Spider bites turn you into a Despacito Spider.
 * 9th-29th: Grey the MTF is hired by Dr Cubano in order to give him privacy to his study of the Despacito Spiders. The exact date is unknown, but it is believed it happened around this time.


 * 30th: Jeuse is captured and crucified by Chad Despacito, leading to his death.

May

 * 1st: Chad Despacito graduates early to become a member of the Army.
 * 6th: A Normal Class-D is promoted to a janitor in the SCP Foundation, with help from Dr. Cubano.
 * 6th cont: Dr. Cubano tells A Normal Class-D that the SCP Foundation is a underground fast food restaurant.
 * 7th: A Normal Class-D starts his janitor job in the SCP Foundation.
 * 10th: A Normal Class-D finds a dropped Level-5 Keycard but does not tell anyone.
 * 12th: A Normal Class-D learns the truth about the SCP Foundation, making him hate Dr. Cubano.


 * 14th: DilanKleBoldt plans a school shooting with his friend, EricHarRisd.


 * 15th: Dilan and Eric shoot up Robloxian High School, killing 12 students as well as their teacher, Xx_IdkAnymore_xX. They committed die afterwards.

June

 * 11th: Dr. Cubano is killed by SCP-173.


 * 13th: THANOS reappears at Robloxian High School to restore balance to the universe.
 * 16th: A Normal Class-D leaks Dr. Cubano's documents to the world, getting him demoted from a janitor to a Class-D.


 * 17th: A video of Sams from Undertal dancing goes viral. He becomes popular for his dancing, as well as becoming the first documented Sans known to exist.
 * 18th: Frogy the Security Guard quickly becomes known for his skills with his shooting baton.


 * 21st: xxxsansacion reveals himself to the public through a rap battle after positive reception to Sams from Undertal. He quickly rises to fame from his amazing rap music.


 * 23rd: Rice Farmer cancels Despacito 2, erasing all progress of it, causing mass panic among all of the followers of Despacitism. He accidentally leaves his hat at the crime scene.


 * 26th: Rice Farmer's hat is found at the crime scene, he is sentenced to death for going against the Despacitism code but escapes by chucking rice at everyone and stabbing a Despacito Spider to death with his sickle.


 * 28th: Rice Farmer is found by Gay Monster, who promptly shoots him. Nobody knows if Rice Farmer died from the shot.
 * 28th cont: Reverse Trit ups and leaves the new Despatrio group because "duospacito is a shit name". Gay Monster decides to leave aswell claiming "he has served his purpose"


 * Mid to Late-June: xxxsansacion is reported to have been shot and killed.

July

 * 14th: xxxsansacion is revealed to be alive and well after escaping prison together with 6ix9ine.
 * 14th cont: First sightings of the Despacito Bird, a subspecies of the Despacito Spider.
 * 15th: THANOS eliminates half the thots in Robloxian High School via snapping.
 * 15th cont: Content Cop begins an investigation into THANOS following the killing of a thot.
 * 15th cont: PP Extendus Man gathers the PP Prophets, Rebellious Teen Despacito and 6ix9ine, to write PPiums official bible, the Sixten.
 * 16th: Communism Man humiliates Donald Trump in a live interview, proving capitalism is weak.
 * 16th cont. Content Cop recruits a partner to help in capturing THANOS, however, it seems like he's actually being recruited for the filming of an actual Content Cop. Whether this means the revival of Idubbbz or not is uncertain.
 * 19th: Black Luigi enters a round of Breaking Point after laying low for several months, slaughtering everyone.
 * 22nd: THANOS snaps away half of Flavortown. Guy Fieri confronts him to no avail.
 * 23rd: Content Cop is seen chasing THANOS through Robloxia, but he doesn't catch him.
 * 25th: Luis Fonsi, or the Mythical OOF, is brought back to life by a group of Despacito Spiders led by Missionary Despacito. The god shows his followers a draft of the new Despacito 2, but it accidentally kills all of them.

August

 * 24th: Gay Monster applies for position of janitor of Robloxian High School. He surprisingly gets the job, but spends most of his time harassing the students with his mop and asking boys to come to the janitor's closet.

November

 * 11th: The first Despacito Landship is created to go to space, after it’s return several men who destroyed major despacito nests went missing, as despacito landships 100% have killing properties it’s likely that the despacito landships were programmed to also destroy despacito nest destroyer.

December

 * 4th: Robloxian Highschool is remodeled due to complaints of collapsing rooms

May

 * 3rd:  Roomrecord is murdered.
 * 5th: Communist Despacito yeets Dein Führer out the window of his apartment, killing Dein Führer

January

 * 31st: THANOS, while listening to Despacito, goes back in time to January 1st, 2000 to create the Despacito Spiders

November

 * 13th: Insanity locates THANOS and kills him.